


Safe With a Daredevil

by ariofthesea



Category: Adventure Time
Genre: AU, Drabble, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-19
Updated: 2015-08-19
Packaged: 2018-04-15 12:23:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4606626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariofthesea/pseuds/ariofthesea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Hunson Abadeer and Simon Petrikov pull off one hell of a show for their little girl</p>
            </blockquote>





	Safe With a Daredevil

**Author's Note:**

> A drabble I wrote a while back on Tumblr that I finally decided to put here

Hunson revved the motorcycle’s engine twice, causing a vibration that felt like earthquake beneath Simon’s seat.  Simon figured this was retribution for that one time he and Marceline almost went on a motorbike ride, only for him to lose control of the bike and for it to crash into a building and explode.  It felt too karmic to be anything else.  Meanwhile, Marceline now cheered for him and her father from the safety of her seat on the bleachers.  As for Simon, he found himself staring down a track fit for the Devil Himself (which he still wasn’t sure if Hunson was or wasn’t, as Hunson always found a way to dodge that topic if it came up).  Simon couldn’t see the end of the track, as a myriad of insane obstacles, including flaming hoops, an electrified cage of death, and inky black tendrils.

“So, um, how many times did you say you’ve done this?”  

Hunson cracked his knuckles.  “Enough to know I can come out in one piece. Not like in the old days.”  A nostalgic smile flashed on his face.  “Man, I remember that one time I misplaced my joints like it was yesterday.”

Simon gulped.  “Yeah?  Well then, I guess we’d better get this show on the road.”

Hunson then swiveled his head around and gave Simon a peck on the lips.

“Relax.  You know you’re safe with me.”

Hunson’s sincere smile helped put Simon’s mind at ease.  However, the unnatural position of Hunson’s head was still a bit uncomfortable to look at. With a pronounced crack, Hunson’s head returned to the right side of his body.

“All right my tur-bro, here we go!  Don’t lose your head along the way!”

Simon’s eyes widened.  “Wait, what was that about losing my heeeeeAAAAAAAAD—!!”

Simon’s voice dragged out as Hunson slammed his foot on the gas and sent them flying forward.  Simon buried his face in Hunson’s back, too terrified to watch the moment they soared through the flaming hoops.

“Don’t look away, man!  You’re missing out on the action!”    

“I’m getting more than enough action trying to hang on!”

“Oho, but you ain’t seen nothin’ yet.”

Simon let out a low, flat “what” right before they entered the Cage of Death.  After at least 30 circuits at over 150 kph, Simon opened his mouth and let the puke fly out, too dizzy to care where it landed or if the electricity fried it.  Hunson slowed down enough to exit the cage and return to the track, only to pick up speed in order to sail across a lava lake filed with whale-sized sharks.  They continued to dodge falling boulders, weave through the toes of colossal feet waiting to stomp on them, and speed through hyper gravity chambers until they reached a calm, straightforward stretch of the course.  Simon at last opened his eyes, just in time to see a fluffy white kitten jump out onto the middle of the track.  Simon was about to sigh in relief, but he came to a realization.

“I’ve been here long enough to know that this is probably some crazy Nightospheric smoke and mirrors we’re looking at, right?”

“Bingo.  Now hold on tight, ‘cuz this is the big one!”

A demonic cloud of violet energy burst from the kitten’s body, blocking the end of the track.  Hunson  held out a hand, and in it materialized his legendary battle axe.  Though Simon felt tempted to look away again when they made contact with that— _thing_ , he decided that he had done enough hiding, and that he wanted to stare this one last obstacle straight in the eye.  At the moment of the impact, Hunson swung the axe forward, tearing through its smoky, rice paper-thin flesh.  The mad ride ended with Hunson and Simon flying off the edge of the cliff where the track broke off and falling into a massive, warm heap of banana bread pudding.  Hunson emerged hollering and howling with excitement, and soon Simon found himself cheering as well.

“That was awesome!”  They heard Marceline call from above.

“Sure was, kiddo!”  Hunson called back.  “Stay right there, Simon and I will be out in a minute.”

Simon sniffed the air around him.  “Wow, this actually smells really tasty.”

Hudson’s ears dropped as he stared at Simon in disgust.  “You can’t be serious.”

“What?  It’s just banana bread pudding, right?”

Hunson’s face warped even more.  He then shook his head as his disgust turned to quiet laughter.  

“One day you’ll get it,” he said as he kissed Simon on the cheek.


End file.
